Several other people are walking alone. A breeze springs up and above the wall the branches of tall trees, their leaves still unwithered, are stirring over my head.
A breeze springs up, and dust is everywhere.
A child begs from me. He is wearing lined clothes like others and does not look unhappy, yet he blocks my way to kowtow and whines as he follows me.
I dislike his voice, his manner. I detest his lack of sadness, as if his were some game. I am disgusted by the way he follows me, whining.
I walk on. Several other people are walking alone. A breeze springs up, and dust is everywhere.
A child begs from me. He is wearing lined clothes like others and does not look unhappy, but he is dumb. HE stretches out his hand to me in dumb show.
I detest this dumb show of his. Besides, he may not be dumb; this may just be his way of begging
I do not give him alms. I have no wish to give alms. I stand above those alms-givers. For him I have only disgust, suspicion and hate.
I am skirting a tumble-down, mud wall. Broken bricks have been piled in the gap, and beyond the wall is nothing. A breeze springs up, sending the autumn chill through my lined gown, and dust is everywhere.
I wonder what method I should use in begging. In what voice should I speak? What dumb show should I use if pretending to be dumb? . . .
Several other people are walking alone.
I shall receive no alms, not even the wish to give alms.
I shall receive the disgust, suspicion and hate of those who consider themselves above the alms-givers.
I shall beg with inactivity and silence. . . .
I shall at last receive nothingness.
A breeze springs up, dust is everywhere. Several other people are walking alone.
Dust, dust. . . .
. . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Dust. . . .
September 24, 1924
Lu Shun
No comments:
Post a Comment